My All Time Favorite Epigraph

and what I hope Letting Magic In is for you

There’s a particularly delicious interview linked near the end of this post that was recorded just before the release of my memoir, Letting Magic In. I hope you enjoy!

To those who first found magic in the pages of a book.

That’s the epigraph from Letting Magic In.

My editor, if she wasn’t the soul of discretion, would tell you how I fussed over those twelve simple words. To all who find magic in the pages of a book? To everyone who first found magic in the pages of a book?

When I’m writing, I’m always thinking about who will be reading—who the book is for. This is, I’m told, backwards. That I should write from the heart and those who are meant to read will find their way to the pages. But writing a book only for myself has always felt like literary masturbation: it might feel earth-shatteringly gorgeous but that doesn’t mean it will land, communicate, and connect.

Another epigraph. This one from E.M. Forster’s Howard’s End (seeing the movie, my friends, is not the same as reading the book). Those two words have been with me since high school. They are the key that has unlocked the doors, and windows, and file cabinets within me.

Only connect.

Five years after I first read those words, I wrote my college senior thesis on Howard’s End. For months I tracked down odd phrases, finding that Forster had woven subtle references through his chapters. These references linked centuries of philosophical thought and created a scaffolding which supported the deeply held, but divergent, beliefs of the book’s characters. Forster’s was a spectacular undertaking.

I can’t claim that kind of mastery in Letting Magic In. It’s my first piece of narrative writing. The learning curve had some incredibly steep spots (I cried both from gratitude and sheer relief when I read Sarah Addison Allen's—one of my favorite authors—endorsement for my book... this part in particular, A must read for the soul searcher, the magic seeker, and anyone who just loves a story well told).

But on both the good writing days and the days where putting my own eyes out seemed a viable option, I used my epigraph as a north star:

To those who first found magic in the pages of a book.

This book was written for you. If you are looking for everyday magic, I’ve laid down a breadcrumb trail that will point you toward the right path. There aren’t lessons or exercises, but instead a story that you can learn from. Like many narrative memoirs, it uses a hero’s journey format: showing you first the arc from a rather ordinary life through a series of struggles to an extraordinary outcome.

My mom told me I love the second half. You seem so happy and stable there!

We all love the second half. Watching someone struggle makes us vaguely uncomfortable. We prefer when things are going smoothly. But in order to understand how to connect, we need to see the disconnect. To truly feel the joy of putting a puzzle together, we need to balance the triumph against the moment of overwhelm when opening the box and wondering how the heck those two thousand pieces will ever be made whole.

Letting Magic In is a book about how I pieced my way to wholeness. If nothing else, I hope that when you’re on your knees looking at the broken bits of your life, you’ll remember this book and know that you can put yourself back together. It will be okay. You will be okay.

If you are a soul searcher, magic seeker, or anyone who just loves a story well told, this book was written for you.

I hope this book will become a companion, a friend you can turn to when:

• you feel like giving up the search for magic

• you’re ready to discard your childhood dreams of the mystic being real

• you need to transition from point A without knowing point B

• you’re done with the “human rat race”

• you need a friend who understands that the path is rarely smooth

But mostly, when you need a reminder to trust yourself, trust in nature, and trust in change…even when it feels terrifying.

Listen in on my conversation with James Navé on Twice 5 Miles Radio as we get into the magical and the mundane, the experience of writing, and times of deep knowing.

Here are what some early readers had to say about Letting Magic In:

"Maia Toll has opened her heart to us all and we find inside magic, wonder, honesty and love. So much love. She’s both teacher and student, and through her we learn that a magical life isn’t about the destination. It’s about the journey. Letting Magic In is about the nurturing and life-changing lessons we can learn when we have the courage to change our narrative from 'What is possible?' to 'Everything is possible.' A must-read for the soul searcher, the magic seeker and anyone who just loves a story well told.”

―Sarah Addison Allen, New York Times bestselling author of Other Birds

"Every sentence, every page, every chapter of this book shines as a singular star. This alone is a boon for the reader. The real gift though, of Letting Magic In, is the way Toll brings them all together in the end—a constellation of light from seemingly separate stars, a path forward for any and all of us who are willing to step out of our ordinary (and often disconnected lives) and into the web that is magical living."

―Steph Jagger, author of Unbound and Everything Left to Remember

"At last! A memoir for those of us who sense that there is far more to our existence than what’s immediately before us . . . a wide-open place of wonder and mystery, of synchronicity and interconnection. Maia Toll chronicles her first steps into this world, which we can follow like a roadmap until we, too, emerge as mystics in our own right."

―Barbara Becker, author of Heartwood: The Art of Living with the End in Mind

"Maia has such a gorgeous and generous way of weaving a web of story—and of drawing the reader in. Her journey is personal and intimate and yet so beautifully and compellingly told that, soon, you’re hearing the wind rustle the leaves, seeing the moon’s trail ripple the sea, and responding to the whisper of your own dormant parts, inviting you to listen, imagine, re-awaken."

―Paige Gilchrist, host of the Embodied Meditation podcast

"In Letting Magic In, Toll recounts the extraordinary journey that, beginning in her late 20s, led her to uncover a life of bigger meaning and real magic. Profound, funny, and gorgeously written, this memoir will leave the reader exhilarated—and ready to set off on their own quest, guided by Toll’s wisdom and uncommon voice."

―Carrie Frye, editor of four New York Times bestselling books

"In this spellbinding memoir, author Maia Toll explores identity and self-discovery while deftly weaving in the knowledge she has gained through her vast studies of herbalism, spirituality, and philosophy. Maia’s story is a sacred gift reminding us to explore the deepest parts of ourselves and to pay attention to the magic that always dwells within."

―Kate Oliver, author of The Modern Caravan

And a thousand times, thank you. Your support and encouragement (especially on such an intimate project) means the world to me. I couldn’t do this without you!